Our Enemies

Life Incorporated is constantly ATTACKED BY HOSTILE ENEMIES TRYING TO KILL US OFF. Here is a convenient list you can help us by ATTACKING BACK.

1. The Axolotlian Government - Constantly raids Lifeton, keeps saying they wanna "liberate the neoslaves" even though WE PAY OUR EMPLOYEES, THEY JUST WANNA STEAL OUR EMPLOYEES, they just aren't allowed to leave Lifeton ever, or take breaks.

2. Grent Riverside Farms - our only competitor, we bought the Grent Riverside Plantations from them and turned it into Lifeton FAIR AND SQUARE, we HAD TO GET PEOPLE IN NO MATTER WHAT, or else our operations WOULD DIE.

3. GPC - Damn Grest won't stop helping the damn government.

4. THE AVERAGE AXOLOTLIAN - HOW DARE YOU NOT BUY OUR PRODUCTS, THEY ARE CHEAP, YOU NEED TO BE CHEAPER, STOP AFFORDING SO CALLED HUMANE PRODUCTS.

5. United Nations, International Court of Justice, and European Union - HOW DARE YOU CALL US A BLIGHT IN THE WEST, WE ARE DOING CAPITALISM, YOU HATE COMMUNISM, STOP SANCTIONING US FOR HUMAN RIGHTS ABUSES.

6. THE PALMER FAMILY - THE PRESIDENT OF AXOLOTLIA AND HIS FAMILY

7. THE AVERAGE WESTERNER - BUY LIFE INC PRODUCTS ASSHOLE

8. THE AVERAGE LIFE INC EMPLOYEE - YOU DESERVE YOUR MOTHERFUCKING SUFFERING, FUCK YOU TRYING TO ESCAPE.

9. YOU

Feel free to harass anyone on this list for us :) OR YOU WILL BECOME OUR EMPLOYEE.